Like many kids in Wisconsin foster care, Cathy has not had many basic life experiences. She recently went into a grocery store for the first time in her life with her foster mom. She was utterly overwhelmed. She is no different than most kids in foster care. She is a survivor. She struggles to trust. She is vulnerable. She is hurting.
A structured, stable foster home environment can provide significant opportunities for healing and growth. Like most other youth in care, Cathy requires a foster home able to support her with patience, consistency, and flexibility.
Her path toward healing begins with new foster parents.
A no-contact order is in place with her father, and communication with her mother has been attempted, although it can be challenging. Their relationship is volatile and unpredictable. Cathy is angry and expresses she has no desire to see her mom.
Cathy is currently placed in a temporary foster home while the referring County searches for a long-term, stable placement for her. She likes her privacy, and being alone is comforting and important to her. She is creative and enjoys arts and crafts, as well as engaging in conversation with others. She is easy to get along with and likes jigsaw puzzles and the foster family dog.
Like many teens, she loves video games. Unfortunately, Cathy cannot play unsupervised because of a history of inappropriate online behavior. Cathy does have a cell phone, although her current foster mom uses a structured phone schedule and supervises content.
Many youth in foster care need gentle reminders.
Basic hygiene reminders are necessary. Showering, deodorant, and feminine hygiene are constant reminders. Like many youth in foster care, Cathy needs encouragement and praise.
Although Cathy has completed her first year of high school, she tests at a 5th-grade level for reading and writing. In addition, she has an IEP and behavior plan at school.
While living with her parents, she required a lot of extra help every morning upon arrival at school due to a bed bug issue at home. She reports that it was hard and uncomfortable starting her day that way. She was often bullied.
Like many teens, she sleeps a lot. However, the current team suspects this may be related to medication. She is seen for med management and attends therapy weekly.
CCR desperately needs more homes for teens.
Teens like Cathy are referred to CCR every day. They are kids hoping for a stable, loving, safe place to call home—a home where adults can be trusted, and kids can begin to heal.
We did not have a home in the right county location for Cathy, so the referring county continued its search. In part, CCR turns away a very high percentage of referred teens because foster parents, new and experienced, fear the unknown. The majority of foster families are afraid of troubled teens. The reality is these are good kids. You can help!
All identifying information are altered to protect the privacy of children.
Wisconsin Boy Needs a Pre-Adopt Foster Home
LaBron is a resilient 10-year-old Wisconsin boy in need of a foster home where he can feel safe, supported, and seen by his foster parents. His story isn’t easy—he’s experienced neglect, physical abuse, and has witnessed family violence—but despite it all, LaBron continues to show his vibrant personality and caring heart.
A boy in foster care with a big heart and a curious spirit
LaBron is the kind of child who lights up when trying new things. He especially loves tasting new foods; his favorite candy is orange Skittles. He enjoys playing basketball outdoors and watching his favorite TV shows. One of the ways LaBron shows his thoughtful nature is in how he plays and interacts with family pets. He is gentle, nurturing, and a helpful caretaker. A foster family with pets may be a perfect match for LaBron.
He had never had his own bedroom before and always shared a space with his mom, so he takes great pride in his tidy bedroom and bed. LaBron enjoys keeping his personal space neat and organized and takes excellent care of his belongings. These small routines help him feel grounded and in control—something that hasn't always been the case in his early years.
LaBron needs a foster family with time, patience, and a flexible schedule.
Because of his early experiences and diagnoses—Phonological Disorder, ADHD, and trauma-related stress disorder—LaBron needs a foster home that can offer structure, patience, and a lot of one-on-one time. He attends school with a 504 plan and is below grade level in most areas, particularly reading. When feeling overwhelmed, he visits the counselor’s office and wraps up in a weighted blanket to help self-regulate.
LaBron is sensitive to loud noises and can become overstimulated, so he must have space to calm down when needed. His ideal home would be quiet, predictable, and nurturing, with caregivers who understand trauma and can set firm but gentle boundaries.
He has weekly Zoom visits with his biological mom, who is incarcerated, and will need continued support for that relationship. He also needs ongoing therapy and medication management.
A pre-adopt foster family is desired
The referring county is searching for a pre-adoptive foster home, however, the goal remains reunification at this time, but that goal can change at any time.
LaBron would thrive in a home where:
He receives individual attention and patience
A foster parent can be present before and after school and during school breaks
There is structure, consistency, and clear expectations
He can continue therapy and medication support
There’s room for quiet, calm spaces when he needs to decompress
Pets are welcome—he gets along well with animals!
Fostering a child like LaBron means showing up with empathy, flexibility, and a willingness to parent using the trauma-informed skills learned in foster parent training. It means seeing beyond behaviors to the boy inside who wants to feel safe, valued, and part of a family.
You can learn more about how to become a foster parent with CCR and contact us when you're ready to take the first step.
All identifying information have been changed to protect the identity of children.
Wisconsin Foster Parent Learns About Trauma from 5-year-old
I wanted to become a foster parent for as long as I can remember. My dream was to foster a younger child under the age of ten. I am a single foster parent with no children of my own, so I safely assumed fostering would come with many challenges. I didn't realize how important it would be to have a team behind me—a dedicated team of professionals with many years of experience working with foster children. Until I received a lengthy email on the first day of school, I also had no idea what I would need from my child's teacher.
Being a foster parent will bring challenges and rewards.
I honestly did not know how much kids were hurting and how many disappointments most had. The day I called CCR to get information about becoming a foster parent was the first I heard about childhood trauma and trauma-informed care. They explained the long-term effects of neglect and abuse on younger children and what that can look like for foster parents. I gained insight into my strengths and how my skills and personal experiences might contribute to helping children heal. I learned that love alone would not be enough, and I would struggle to succeed without proper support.
I became a foster parent and got my first placement quickly.
I didn't know how long it might take to get a call, and I worried if I was ready to take on the responsibility of parenting someone else's child. Self-doubt took over. Although my case manager said my feelings were "normal," I questioned myself. The call came much sooner than I anticipated!
Jaydeen was a tiny 5-year-old that came to my home wide-eyed and full of energy. Lots of energy! Without a doubt, it wasn't always positive energy. The first few days, okay months, were a challenge. Jaydeen lacked any semblance of structure. She struggled to listen, and there were no boundaries with play, mealtime, or bedtime. It was a lot to witness initially, and I immediately depended on my case manager and Jaydeen's teacher to reassure me.
My foster child's first day of school was filled with challenges.
I drove Jaydeen to school with extreme trepidation and nearly cried when I left her. We had been together for just a few days. I wondered if the teacher could handle her with the other children in the classroom. Jaydeen struggled in all the ways CCR told me a child her age might.
In addition to living with me, a stranger, Jaydeen, had been torn from family, friends, and school. I prayed her teacher would have a successful first day with her. I didn't anticipate the trauma-informed care principles her teacher would apply on day one. I received an email detailing Jaydeen's first day; it was insightful and gave me much hope.
Good evening; I wanted to give you an idea of how Jaydeen's day went.
When Jaydeen came to school, she did a great job lining up and following the class into school. When we get into school, frog stickers are on the floor the students stand on while waiting to use the bathroom. Jaydeen was having trouble standing on the frog and began running down the hallway. It escalated when I asked her to stop, and she kept running. After using the bathroom, students hung up their items, and Jaydeen did this beautifully.
Class begins with circle time. Jaydeen did not sit in the circle but instead played at a table with some manipulatives. I put them out for her in advance, anticipating that sitting still on her first day may be challenging. (I've seen this before) Unfortunately, during our circle time, she began playing in all centers and throwing toys at us to get our attention. We continued with circle time, ignoring the behavior, and she stopped. Her behavior adjustment was very encouraging.
Ignoring negative behaviors worked well at times.
During playtime, Jaydeen ran around the room and screamed on and off very loudly. She knocked kids' toys over and watched them react. When I approached her, she ran away. We gently asked her to stop and explained that it was not safe, and she calmed down a bit. When Jaydeen is NOT getting a reaction or attention, she will stop some negative behavior.
I had another adult in my room, and she asked Jaydeen to play a game. She settled down for about 10 minutes and played a few games in the quiet area. After that, she played calmly with a few of the other students. She was enjoying her playtime. The adult played with her in another center, but she started hitting her. I tried to engage her in more calming activities, but that wasn't easy. She did manage to work nicely in the art center for a brief time with me.
The day was long, but there were many positive behaviors.
During clean-up time, Jaydeen took the timer and ran out the door down the hallway. She came back and said, "I hid the timer." I didn't react and said it was time to clean up and go home. Jaydeen returned to the room with the timer and helped clean up the classroom. She got ready to go and lined up nicely with the other kids. She waited quietly and patiently for you to pick her up.
The safety of all children is paramount.
I know this is new to her, and you and I will continue to use tools to encourage positive behavior. However, please understand that the safety of all children is paramount. I am hopeful that she will get into a routine with consistency and time.
I hope this email isn't too overwhelming. Feel free to let me know if I can help in any way.
WOW! WOW! Her first day at a new school brought out so many behaviors. More than I had witnessed at home. These are the things that CCR taught in the foster parent training. Teachers and seasoned foster parents expect actions like these from kids with significant trauma, especially severely neglected children. Jaydeen's teacher and my case manager saw it from day one. I am so blessed that both women are part of my team on my foster parenting journey.
Her teacher did everything right!
What I appreciate most is that her teacher looked for positive ways to redirect Jaydeen. Also, trauma-informed care practices allowed many positive outcomes throughout the school day. Most importantly, she continued with patience and encouragement. I can't imagine how hard it must be to have a disruptive student in the classroom.
Several weeks have passed, and Jaydeen is making progress daily at home and school. Her teacher communicates with me regularly so that we are both on the same page. Trauma is ugly. Trauma is real. Most importantly, I truly believe that kids can heal from trauma!
Please get in touch with CCR or call anytime. The staff will help anyone explore how to become a foster parent. 800-799-0450
Why Are So Many Kids in Foster Care
Wisconsin foster parents understand the challenges of caring for kids from hard places. Unfortunately, children in foster care have experienced unsafe conditions, sexual or physical abuse, and neglect or have parents who cannot care for them. Most kids in Wisconsin foster care have been severely neglected, partly due to parental drug use. A sibling group of five recently entered care, and the conditions and family dynamics that led to their removal are shared below.
The #1 reason kids are in foster care.
The "Martins" cannot control their substance abuse, and it inhibits their parental capacities. Their children are vulnerable and exposed to threatening circumstances they cannot manage or control. The behavior of both parents has ill effects on the children, and extended family members have not successfully shielded the children from the impact of their drug addiction and behaviors. Mr. and Mrs. Martin do not have sufficient, safe housing for their children.
For over three years, the Martins informally placed their five children, ages 9, 6, 5, 3, and 2, with family members and friends. Finally, in late 2018, temporary caregivers agreed that Mr. and Mrs. Martin would attend a drug treatment program for their addiction to methamphetamine and heroin. Yet, six months later, neither enrolled in a treatment program and had minimal contact with their children.
Family and friends could not keep the siblings together for most of the three years. As a result, the children were separated and moved frequently between homes. Mr. and Mrs. Martin made several attempts to care for the children but repeatedly sent the kids back to family and friends.
The Department of Human Services reportedly offered the family services since early 2019. Those services included relative placements, guardianship, jail visits, voluntary placement agreements, referrals for mental health and AODA, transportation, groceries for relative caregivers, power of attorney paperwork, and home visits.
A sibling group of 5 enters foster care.
In 2021, family members could no longer care for the children and returned to living with their parents. Shortly after that, the children were found in a camper during the arrest of Mr. Martin. The trailer was in disarray, and the children were taken to County Health and Human Services. Human Services determined that neither of the parents could care for the children, and a protective plan was implemented. A medical evaluation resulted in a hair follicle examination and returned positive for environmental exposure to methamphetamine for all five children.
Under Wisconsin's Stature 48.13(10), neglect is defined as Whose parent, guardian, or legal custodian neglects for reasons other than poverty to provide necessary care, food, clothing, medical or dental care, or shelter to seriously endanger the physical health of the child. Critical care includes protection from behaviors that threaten a child's physical health.
A chaotic lifestyle surrounded by drug use and domestic violence.
Mrs. Martin has been referred to various programs for intravenous drug use, anxiety, depression, and paranoia. She states that Mr. Martin has threatened to kill her on two occasions. Mrs. Martin has a strained relationship with her biological mother and has limited contact. She cannot remain employed due to continued drug use and high anxiety levels. Inpatient programs have been unsuccessful, and she is now considering an outpatient self-help program.
Mr. Martin reports he has struggled with drug addiction for 20 years. He believes an inpatient stay at a rehabilitation center will be most successful in achieving sobriety. Unfortunately, attempted inpatient stays in the past have failed due to repeated drug relapses. At this time, he is hopeful to begin another drug program soon. Upon completion, he wants to find employment and support his family. Mr. Martin states he struggles with prescription medication, meth, and heroin and has a long history with law enforcement, including:
Auto theft
Bail jumping
Resisting an officer
Manufacture/Delivery of narcotics
Reckless endangerment
Burglary
Aggravated battery
DWI
Possession of prescription drugs without a prescription
Mrs. Martin recently filed for legal separation from Mr. Martin. Mr. Martin is currently in county jail for possession of controlled substances. Mrs. Martin has recently applied for disability benefits and is in an active AODA program, and Mr. Martin hopes to attend an inpatient program upon release.
How long are kids in foster care?
Generally, placement in foster care is temporary and intended to give families time to make necessary changes so that the children can live safely in their homes and community. Most children in foster care return home to their families, which is called reunification. When children cannot return home, they find permanence through adoption, guardianship, or other means.
This sibling group is cared for in a loving foster home, and reunification is the permanency plan for the family. The Martins have challenging work ahead of them. Both must establish mental health and AODA therapy to reunify with their children and show continued involvement and participation in that program. They must demonstrate that they can parent the children without drug use. In addition, the Martins must establish sufficient, safe housing for themselves and the children.
If the parents cannot eliminate or manage the safety concerns that threaten the children's well-being, Human Services will look for permanency options other than reunification. On average, kids like this sibling group of five spend 12-24 months in a CCR foster home. Each child has a specific treatment plan to address trauma histories and help the child heal and flourish. CCR foster parents adopt approximately 18% of kids in care.
Foster agencies struggle to place large sibling groups.
Many county agencies need help placing larger groups, so they often refer the kids to a private foster agency like CCR. We receive 40-50 referrals from counties across Wisconsin each month. Many are sibling groups of 2, 3, 4, or 5. Half of our foster parents are caring for siblings or more than one child. Our foster parents are prepared and trained to care for siblings and children with higher-level needs due to abuse and neglect.
It takes three months to become a foster parent with CCR and begin fostering a child or siblings.
Interested in learning how you can help siblings in Wisconsin foster care? Please feel free to contact us anytime. We would love to speak with you.
Wisconsin foster care has over 7,400 kids in out of home care at any time. Ages of foster children range from infant to young adults. If you are interested in how to become a foster parent, one of the biggest decisions you will make is the age range of the foster children you wish to care for. The need for loving foster homes in Wisconsin is desperate. It is important to know your own strengths and weaknesses and what age group will be the best fit for you and your family.
Wisconsin foster parents can choose the children they foster.
One of the first questions you will be asked by a CCR new foster parent adviser is "What age group are you interested in fostering?" Saying you are open to fostering children of any age is not realistic. (Just being honest) Few foster parents can foster all ages successfully. Strengths and weaknesses will surely come into play when parenting foster kids, no different than if you are raising or have raised kids of your own.
New foster parents are encouraged to have an age group preference.
Enjoying certain age groups or feeling you're "better" with specific ages is okay and encouraged. There are too many factors involved for a new foster parent to say they will care for a foster child of ANY age. Obviously caring for a toddler requires a different schedule and requirements than does fostering a 12-year-old. New foster parents must be able to meet the day to day needs of kids and the needs are great.
Considering your flexibility, availability for appointment requirements, drive times, unexpected illness or days off school, holidays and summer vacation, are all factors to think about when considering your age preference.
The "T" word. These kids aren't as scary as you might think!
There is usually no middle ground with this decision. Either foster parents want teens or they don't. We find that prospective foster parents afraid of teens don't really understand what the kids need and what amazing things they can offer this age group.
The majority of teens in foster care haven't had a dependable adult in their life. No adult to trust. No structure, consistency, or support. They are alone and may very well be facing adulthood alone. Teaching life skills, independent living skills, applying for jobs, navigating relationships, learning to drive, all these things require a trusting adult to help teach and guide a teen.
Often times, meeting the emotional needs of a teen can be draining for any parent. Teenagers can certainly test and challenge the best of parents. Patience, good listening skills, trust, belief in a child, and meeting them where they're at are critical to helping a youth heal from past traumas.
Their needs are great and complex but for many foster parents, they love the challenge of breaking through, making progress, and providing hope for a bright future.
How a foster child comes in the door and how they leave can be dramatically and beautifully different.
There are thousands of amazing testimonials from foster parents that have helped change the future of a teen. Unfortunately, the abuses and horrible actions of a very small minority of foster parents is what most of us hear and cling to. Stories of amazing progress and bright futures are rarely talked about unless highlighted on Ellen or social media.
Stories of parents developing lifelong relationships with kids they fostered. Meeting their spouses and children years later. Sharing holidays with former foster youth. If you really want to change the life of a child, foster a teenager.
Many new foster parents have exceptional skills and patience to care for younger children with trauma.
Teaching a child how to dress, fasten a seat belt, or how to use words instead of actions are all extremely important and part of typical parenting. Bedtime rituals, morning routines, and eating habits almost always require time and patience from any parent. If these day to day exercises and challenges are what you enjoy then fostering younger children might be a great fit for you and your family. However, you must remember, kids in foster care will often come withextra challenges.
So, you think you want to help little kids while they are still young and impressionable.
Many new foster parents think that fostering kids while they are young, allows for more teachable moments. Parenting a child before they are set in their ways or have developed bad behaviors like older kids is a common interest of people exploring fostering. Believing that younger children don't have the behaviors and emotional struggles that older kids and teenagers have is a HUGE misconception. In fact, it can be quite the opposite, depending on the child.
Toddlers and young children in foster care often have heightened needs due to severe neglect.
Is patience your middle name? Do you like hands-on parenting and meeting the ever-changing needs that little ones have? Toddlers and young children in foster care often display a variety of delays and behaviors that can be challenging. Delays with language, processing, hygiene skills, food associations, and inappropriate expressions of frustration are commonplace.
Fostering preschool-age children can be challenging for those not up to the task. Because kids in this age group can often be delayed and cannot always articulate how they feel or what they need, days can be long and frustrating. Behaviors can be heightened or age-inappropriate depending on the abuse or neglect a child experienced. Trauma stunts a child's growth and development and foster parents must understand that this age group will require more from them than what might be expected.
The average age of a child in foster care is 10 years old.
The greatest need in Wisconsin and throughout the country is for kids over the age of 5 and sibling groups. That is true at CCR as well. The average age of boys in our care is 10, the average age for girls is 11. This population is often the least requested for no specific reason, other than folks preferring "little ones" or teens. Many kids in this age group come into care with younger siblings.
A rewarding part of fostering kids in grade or middle school is getting them involved in extracurricular activities and helping them navigate the challenges of school. Remember, until foster care, many kids have not had an adult active in their education, developed healthy relationships with classmates or teachers, or been involved in sports or after school activities.
Getting kids active is imperative to healing from past traumas.
Getting a foster child involved in an extracurricular activity not only occupies their downtime and frees them from electronics, but it also teaches them valuable life skills.
Time management
Teamwork
Goal Setting
Confidence Building
Stress management
Social Skill Development
Extracurricular activities expose kids to so many things they have never experienced. Our foster parents have great stories about witnessing kids coming out of their shells, improving relationships with peers, and building confidence.
This age group is rewarding for many foster parents because there are so many positive changes happening at once. Progress is obvious, kids are developing passions and exploring new interests all the time. If there are siblings involved, kids can now share new interests with their brothers and sisters which help relationship development within the family.
What age group interests you now might change over time.
Many foster parents start with one age group and wish to try another age later down the road. At CCR, we do ask that parents have a large enough preference window that will allow for opportunity of placements. For example ages 10 and under, kids between ages 8-13, or teen girls. It is very helpful to have a wide window so that you have ample opportunity to get calls with potential placements.
If you are only interested in babies, you may be waiting for a very long time. Most infants remain in county foster care and are rarely referred to a private agency. The exception may be if the baby is part of a larger sibling group.
The choice is yours. Know your strengths and weaknesses and be confident with what you can offer a child or sibling group in your care. Keep in mind other children in your home, your availability and schedules, and what you know you can offer a child with a traumatic background.
Call us anytime to learn more. 800-799-0450
Can Foster Parents Have Pets?
If you are exploring how to become a foster parent and have fur babies or farm animals, this blog is for you. Perhaps you worry about your four-legged friends sharing the home with foster kids. Pets provide acceptance without judgment and offer kids in foster care dependable relationships with little risk. Not just indoor pets. Many of our foster parents have outdoor animals and see many benefits for both kids and their animals.
Foster care is synonymous with stress.
It's no secret that pets provide unconditional support and acceptance, which many foster children have not received from family or social relationships in the past. Having a pet in the home can have a calming effect on children and often forces them to connect and engage with their foster parents and siblings more quickly than in a home without animals.
Communication and interaction may be more natural when animals are used as a buffer or a shared common interest. Pets can be a positive distraction from symptoms and upsetting experiences a child may have had before being placed in foster care. Many foster children experience stress, particularly early on in a placement. Kids can feel comfort and acceptance from a pet long before developing those feelings with their new foster family.
Foster children experience order and continuity.
Caring for a pet can give foster children a feeling of control, security, and routine. Providing kids with some responsibility in the care of animals generates a sense of order and continuity in their day-to-day activities. Caring for pet animals provides children with the experience of taking responsibility for another living being, may support the development of empathy, and has been shown to relate to more humane attitudes later in life.
Simple chores such as feeding a cat before school, cleaning a cage or stall on a weekend morning, and even brushing the family dog gives kids a feeling of responsibility. These activities can foster an attachment to pets and animals and generates feelings of respect for their new family. Foster parents tell us that caring for animals is a quick way for kids to feel they belong to a new foster family placement.
"When I first got to the Smiths, I was nervous and cried a lot. I used to bury my face into Bennie's neck and cry. He let me and never jumped off the bed."
Pets can provide emotional support.
Research from the University of Missouri-Columbia suggests that the hormonal changes that occur when humans and dogs interact could help people cope with depression and certain stress-related illnesses. In one Missouri study, scientists tested dog owners' and non-owners hormone levels. They found that people received the most benefit (through increased serotonin levels) when petting their dogs. Also, simply stroking the dog for 15-30 minutes lowered the participants’ blood pressure by 10 percent.
It is reported that dogs may help children to regulate their emotions because they can trigger and respond to a child’s attachment-related behavior. How children best benefit from being with pet animals and how often they need to interact with them to get results is something, our foster parents can speak about confidently.
"When the girls arrived, they were afraid of the goats. Little by little, I would take them out to say hello. After about three weeks, they began petting them on the head. Now feeding the goats and helping with chores is part of their routine."
Relationships with pets have an essential role.
There is growing evidence that animals can offer features of a secure attachment relationship for children. In addition, children can form an emotional attachment with pets that are consistent in some respects with human attachment theory. Pets satisfy the need for comfort and reassurance. Attachments to pets may provide security and stability for children to explore their environment.
While having pets in the home cannot cure mental illness or be a "quick fix" for children with significant trauma, there are enough evidence and testimony to suggest that it does help. Studies have found that people with pets generally reported a greater sense of control and a feeling of security and routine. More importantly, studies have found that adults and older youth with greater attachment and relationships to animals during childhood demonstrate greater empathy, confidence, and independence in adulthood.
Children in foster care often experience sleep difficulty, headaches, anxiety, social stress, lack of confidence, and attachment disorders, all of which may be helped by caring for or attaching to a family pet. Most CCR foster homes have pets or farm animals and have witnessed the healing benefits for children in their care.
GET YOUR FOSTER LICENSE IN 100 DAYS! Homes for kids 10-18 are desperately needed.
Mr. Martin reports he has struggled with drug addiction for 20 years. He believes an inpatient stay at a rehabilitation center will be most successful in achieving sobriety. Unfortunately, attempted inpatient stays in the past have failed due to repeated drug relapses. At this time, he is hopeful to begin another drug program soon. Upon completion, he wants to find employment and support his family. Mr. Martin states he struggles with prescription medication, meth, and heroin and has a long history with law enforcement, including:
If you are exploring 
Also, simply stroking the dog for 15-30 minutes lowered the participants’ blood pressure by 10 percent.